Lives and Sirens

Last night I was up late, digging through an old box of notebooks when I stumbled across some excellent pieces of writing I have done. For as long as I can remember, writing as been my passion, but these pieces are about my career passion. Since last night's shift was short and mostly dull, I figured I would share these bits with you. All of these bits are actual events that have happened in my life; and have definitely made me better for it.

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Almost all the girls I know love to shop. The lip gloss, heels, the sick obsessions that the worshipers of the estrogen throne embrace. Frankly, I find it disgusting; then again, some fine my obsession sick as well. Difference is, I heal people.

My cheap thrills come from a body craving a hormone; Adrenaline. The stimulus of this is so much cooler than it sounds; the sound of a siren heading towards a code delta, The flashing lights heading towards a code Charlie. There is something addictive and sexy about the color of an ambulance, and honestly, I don't know why anybody does drugs.

Clearly, I am not normal, and that's okay. I don't live for normality. I live this life to save others; I am an EMT.

There is this scene that plays in my head, its as if my dramatic life turns into a movie. This scene includes dancing, a catchy tune from Elvis and a horde of firemen. Its the closing scene for my struggles, for when my goals are all met and I finally get my happily ever after. That moment is what I know will never happen, but I still pretend I will land it. Unfortunately I'm pretty aware my life isn't going to end on a moral high note, no matter how hard I try.
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I was a seventeen year old dreamer, full of drive, determination and ambition. I was different from the other girls. They wore lipstick and miniskirts, I wore tennis shoes and my EMT hoodie. I worked on trucks and was obsessed with the sound of sirens, being the first to hear one wherever I was at. I sat on the front row of my EMT class, the more I knew, the more I could do.

Every session of basic class we were allowed a ten minute break, and we spent most of it grabbing food or taking a 5 minute breather outside of the classroom. I had been anxious most of the day and decided to spend the break walking outside, trying to burn off the extra energy. Across the street from our building was a cemetery, and as I walked outside I saw it surrounded by fire trucks, ambulances and police cars, all of which had their lights on.

"Oh my gosh..." I whispered, feeling the cool autumn air against my face.

"EMT John Doe Please Respond." A single voice called out from one of the rigs. Nothing happened, and goosebumps ran up and down my spine. "EMT John Doe Please Respond." They called for him three more times before their final call . "EMT John Doe has fallen."

The sirens wailed and I felt myself try not to cry and I watched the scene. I felt a classmates hand on my back as he joined me and we watched the scene in silence. It was tragic, but it was so inspiring. It was that reinforcer that I needed and taught me that regardless of what happens, your team will be there to the grave.
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